I'm bringing sexy back, folks

I must've just uncovered a secret sexiness and I probably shouldn't share the secret, but I will because I'm just THAT nice. This weekend, I accidentally started a trend.to not shower. Yep, that's right. I woke up Saturday and instantly became the cleaning fairy in my loft. During that time, I started laundry in the building, and was truly becoming Cinderella with a scrubbing brush, suds and all.

(sidenote: that scrubbing takes some real elbow grease! I suppose if I did that more often I may switch from Cinderella to Popeye! Then, I had to front the many unfinished canvases glaring, not just staring, but glaring at me because they know I've neglected them. Poor paintings, I'm sorry! So I began painting, then noticed the rolls of wrapping paper peeking out from below the couch.yet another reminder of something not done. Sheesh. So where in that ridiculously packed day was there time for a) a shower, and b) to sweep my teeth?? I'm kidding.only slightly because I realized late in the day "OMG, I haven't even brushed my teeth!" But that's ok because I encountered no one and honestly, they looked and felt pretty clean. Don't worry, I brushed them extra tough and long before bed, AND did Crest Whitestrips! Go me!I considered taking a shower after all was aforementioned and done, and yet considered (for almost a 1/2 of a second) to polish my toenails, but that sentiment vanished as quick as it came. Instead, I thinking I deserved a break. I chatted with a guy on match.com (yes, I'm on it, and no, I'm not embarrassed, obviously!).he seemed cool, nice, "normal". Then, The Cuddler (my "double-wide" recliner) so sweetly called my name: "Baby, come have a seat.relax, you deserve it, you've worked so hard all day. Come!" So I did. How could I say no?Today, I woke up and distinct to doze a few hundred times afterward the alarm, then skipped church! That is awful. It's ONE day a week.ONE!.and I skipped it to go to the huge Reebok/Adidas Warehouse sale. Do you mean I showered before that? Eee-er. No. Sho' didn't. Went to Lowe's, then Meijer. And here is where my day off for the worse. Although, here is also where I apparently brought sexy back.Meijer.a shop I don't usually enter, at least not since college. I chose it above Aldi, being that Aldi doesn't protect their customers' credit card information and both of my bank account #'s and pins were stolen from there, Meijer seemed pretty appealing. I slip-slided through the parking lot, got a basket to shop, and got my goods. Looking for rice chex, I pass 2 employees.males. They are rich in convo. I just noticed them because they were blocking the aisle I needed. Timeout: Let me describe my outfit. I am wearing somewhat skinny jeans but not super tight, Ugg-alike boots, big sweatshirt, t-shirt hanging out, puffy vest, ear/headband for warmth, and my dirty hair is pulled back into the world's tiniest pony-tail. Correction, world's 2nd tiniest pony-tail because 1st place went to the security guard at the Reebok Warehouse.I suppose she got me on length, but I definitely got her on girth.that miss had to get a number of 10 hairs to get 1 pony-tail.sad. :Ok, timeout is over. I pass by the 2 guys, and 1 so rudely interrupts his counterpart to say "Damn, she is sexy as a motherf*cker!" And his eyes are all over my puffy vest and dirty hair. I pass, ignore the comment because he either a) thought my headband was soundproof, or b) wanted me to see that. I could've hit myself at that item because the gangway with the rice chex was the one he was blocking. I pass into the aisle, only to give Mr. Obvious and hear "She is sexy as hell!" Now, folks, was the appropriate answer to these comments to:1. Keep walking, ignore ignore ignore, and read the cereal aisle as though you are reading nutritional information on every box.OR2. Acknowledge him, say "Hi, your call is.read his nametag), insert name here. I heard you say I'm sexy. Are you single?"OR3. Acknowledge him, drop kick him for existence a pig and say "How's THAT for sexy!"Well of course #1. But, this is what I don't get.when guys make those comments, do they truly in their hearts feel they are being free to women? And do they imagine those actions get good reactions, like "Here's my #!" Same with honking the horn. Guys honk and roaring at girls running/walking all the time.do they actually think we're passing to wave our arms to pin them consume and beg them to payoff because we can't resist their studly-ness? Uh no. And I'm sorry if they HAVE gotten that case of reaction in the past.So yes, I brought sexy back by not showering and wearing my baggy, puffy, most nonflattering clothing. That's the secret, Ladies, don't shower, wear hot clothes, a headband for warmth, fake uggs with the buttons falling off, and for extra sexiness, might as easily not brush your teeth for a few days.it seems we should do the opposition for a transfer and we'll get a big reception from the gentlemen! WOOT WOOT!